Apr. 6th, 2006

the13thfairy: (Anat - Phoenician Sacrifice)
So tomorrow I go in and they stick a teeny camera down my throat and look at the inside of my stomach. I have to fast from Midnight on - and I ate too damn much tonight. *ow* I don't do that very often, but MAN when I do.... *ow*

Tomorrow afternoon I will be home, and hoping to be able to go to 9Sisters Black Cycle. It's not that there is a lot to recover from - it's just that the doctors don't want me doing much while the various drugs they will give me (to make me not notice the camera) are working their way through my system.

I should have my surgery date before the end of the month. I am hoping to schedule it the first week of May so that I can do Month End for April, and then return to work first week of June, so that I can do Month End for May. That would make BayCon the last bit of time off I would have while recuperating. I know doing the Con whilst on such a restrictive diet will be interesting, but I just want this over with. And I am sorry - BayCon does not some first when my health is the issue. For once I am putting me first - yes you can all take a breath and mark it in your calendars, I am putting me first. Don't get used to it, it doesn't happen all that often. :P

In fact it may start happening more often - in fact it will HAVE to. WLS is major surgery - it changes major things in major ways. It will force me to pay more attention to ME - to keep from getting all the bad post-op problems.

If this surgery isn't the near to the top ultimate clue to start prioritizing and paying attention to how I part out my highly valuable time, I don't know what is. Things may have to change a lot in my life - I may have to let go of some thigns, walk away from some other, or just simplify and distance myself for my own good.

On a day to day basis I am so DONE. I think that is why I indentify with Anat so much (see the user icon on this post) the Phoenician Goddess of Sacrifice. I can only give so much of myself and not get anything back. There comes a time when making others happy is not sufficient result to feed the self and the soul.

On a brighter note [livejournal.com profile] maiandra will be our houseguest this Saturday night and Sunday morning she will be helping me to start listing stuff for sale on eBay. Perhaps I can not only get rid of some of the clutter and apron strings of the past, but even realize a bit of fundage from it too. There will be some bits of sewing stuff like a bunch of ancient patterns, some doll stuff, some Barbie stuff, some action figures (a good nubmer of Klingon ones most likely), perhaps some books, perhaps some holiday decorations (Xmas and Halloween for example), and anything else I can live without, place a value on, get a picture of, and describe sufficiently to list on eBay.

So that's me as of this evening. We'll see how I feel tomorrow after the Endoscopy and hopefully finding out the results of the tissue pathology from my D&C last Friday and the results of the abdominal ultrasound yesterday.

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